It's time for an eating disorder update. Most of my posts lately have been rather vague on the recovery front, and that was the whole point of this blog. So here goes!I'm actually doing okay right now. I haven't been counting, but I think I'm at a week or so. The spring was great, I went a month two or three times. Being with my love helps me to stay calm and get through it. We work together on recovery, and we get there.
The summer, being away, tons of stress, everything new, lots of unknowns... yeah it's been hard. There have been some bad weeks, as evidenced by the puffy-cheeked little picture here a few weeks ago.
It's hard, not binging. I've managed to not purge on a number of occasions, but stopping the urges, that's painful. My whole body almost hurts when I have to resist. It's like a menace that takes over your brain. But the less I do it, the less I struggle. So that's good.
Overall, I'm still seeing steps forward. I'm learning the patterns that create bad cycles. Now it's just learning when I have to be on guard. That's a hard thing, and the world is full of triggers. It's impossible to avoid them all, so I just have to learn how to work around them. But God is gracious, and sustaining, and I have to rest there.
Lots of love,
Sheila
Reading about your journey has been so amazing. You are a very brave person for sharing your struggles. I absolutely agree that finding ways to deal with triggers is one of the hardest things. It takes a lot of commitment to yourself and your health to change patterns of behavior and I appreciate you blog and you sharing your story.
ReplyDeleteMargaretta Cloutier @ Aspire Wellness Center